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Tuesday, August 20, 2013

First day of school... oh boy!

In the last several days, families across the country have been preparing to send their kids off to new school year. Commercials, newspaper and magazine articles and Facebook posts are all revolving around "back to school.". How excited am I!?!?! Ummm... not so much! While everyone is out buying uniforms and school supplies and new shoes, I'm still trodding along in my normal routine, trying to fill my gas tank, pick up prrscriptions and get to work. But thus is one of those times of year (and there are several) when we childless people become invisible. We have nothing to contribute to the conversations of our friends, neighbors and coworkers, as they go on and ON about how tough it is to get their little ones ready for kindergarden, their teens ready for their sports, and their older kids moved into dorms and apartments. I stand by and watch... offering help to my SS21 and my "surrogate kid,"and occasionally being taken up on my offer, so I feel at least marginally helpful. But, I must admit it is a little easier to deal with this year - perhaps because I'm just getting used to being an outsider, perhaps because of the reality of a hysterectomy in my not-too-distant future, maybe a combination of several things. But it still feels isolating, being on the outside of these nearly universal experiences. And it's lonely on the outside.


  1. You're not alone, the community is here, and for me, I can echo- today is the first day of school. I tried not to think about that, but hard when co-workers talked about their kids. So I hid in my office all day. Treated myself to a pedicure for resisting emotional eating.

    Just remember, we're here. *hugs*

  2. You've captured so much of what I have felt at times like this. It is the invisible bit that is hard. The more I remind myself of the parts of life that are unique to me, the easier I can let the feelings pass, but it's never pleasant when they resurface.

  3. Thank you both. I wish you didn't have to understand, but it's nice to know someone does.
    Hiding does help, Wolfers. And Jen, you're right... the feeling invisible may be one of the hardest things to swallow.
    I guess we've made our way through the toughest part.... good thing!!!