Sunday, May 20, 2012
I had a great aunt who was childless. I don't know any of the details about why that was the case. Did she try? Did she have miscarriages? Did she have fibroids or endo? Did it sadden her the way is has me? Was it difficult for her to see her sister and brother have children and grandchildren, while she was widowed and didn't have any kids of her own. We all (the great neices and nephews) kind of thought of her as a third grandmother. We celebrated Mother's day with her. She was included in all the family gatherings. But I know that sometime those very same joyful occasions can be difficult because I don't have a child in the mix. I wonder if she was at peace with it all. And if she was, how did she get there? Or was it ever a question of accepting or not... did she just see it as the hand she was dealt. I wish she were still here to ask. But if she does see what I am going though, if she does hear me calling out to her through my tears, I hope she knows I love her and miss her every single day!